"Goodnight Moon," say Monkeys

Upon hearing the news that the Bunny Pickin' Flowers had invaded hell and potentially unleashed hordes upon hordes of marauding demons bent on the destruction of Earth, the Monkeys Who Play Sports charitably offered to read bedtime stories to anybody who needed extra comforting.

"I think we all know what it's like to be scared," said Monkeys team captain Gridiron. "I know I'm a little scared right now. But I think everybody can agree that a good bedtime story is just as good as tea and shortbread when it comes to soothing the worried heart."

Starting on Thursday, the Monkeys will be making housecall stories available to Monster Island residents and phonecalls to their international fans. All five of the Monkeys offered their services, though Starr said he'd most likely be reading people a bedtime screenplay.