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Reporters Preview New X-Ball
"Much better than Diet X-Ball With Lemon," says AP


Monster Island, 01.11.02 - The International Press, currently unoccupied by anything else happening in the world, gathered for a week-long retreat on Monster Island to preview the new, "improved" game of X-Ball.

Members of the press were greeted by legions of screaming journalism groupies, or "newsies." Ushered past the crowds of crying Asian schoolgirls and signs reading "AP Wire 4 Evah" and "Reuters Rocks!" the press was led to their stretch limos and taken to the exclusive Nakamaji Arms Hotel. Once they were settled into their individual bi-level suites, Nakamaji Bionically Engineered Pleasure Executives greeted each member of the press, and after 30-45 minutes escorted them to the conference room.

"Thank you for coming to my humble little island," said Hiro Nakamaji once all the members of the press were seated. "Soon enough, we will show you the new, improved version of X-Ball. But first, who likes money?"

The ceiling then opened up, and dumped piles of cash on the eager newsmen and women.

After a week filled with fun in the sun, carnivals, and the mysterious disappearance of those nosy New York Times reporters, the time came to reveal the new look of the world's most popular sport.

Each press member was allowed exactly thirty seconds to watch a new X-Ball game in action through a pin-hole sized hole in a concrete wall before being sent home.

Reviews have been glowing, to say the least. The Los Angeles Times said "The New X-Ball will knock your socks off. A rollercoaster ride from start to finish." From the London Daily Telegraph: "I can't wait to watch the new X-Ball in my flat while eating buscuits with me mum." And, in a letter from the New York Times: "Hi. Can we have our reporters back?"