"I'm A Big Dork Who Also Sucks"

Gridiron, unaware that his real thesis had been stolen by the nefarious Rotsies and replaced with a funnier, more irreverent thesis, presented before the thesis review board today.

X-Ball Online has managed to obtain a copy of his hilarious thesis and is proud to present a choice excerpt:

"Hello, members of the board -- I'm glad to see that you're all wearing the pants made out of cheese. I myself am a big dork who also sucks. Did I say sucks? If I did, I said it because I suck.And what's with X-Ball University? It's the most stupid school ever, and all the teachers are ugly! Did I say ugly? I did! You heard me! Why don't you come here and smell my finger? I suck, I suck, I suck, I suck, I suck, I suck. And I'm stupid. Stupid stupid stupid. So I heard this funny joke about me being stupid. You want to hear it? Okay, here goes: I'm a monkey that is stoooooooooopid."

It continued in this manner for four hundred pages, all of which Gridiron read out loud to the board because he was too embarrassed to stop.